Saturday, May 28, 2016

The Freakness

Much of Wampus Country is an equestrian society; it will come as little surprise that horse-racing is an appreciated pastime.  While there are varying levels of formality and tradition among races, one odd event of note is the Freakness.

Held biannually, the Freakness Stakes is a horse-race in which the first rule is that one may not ride an actual horse.  Other mounts are welcome: emu, hippopotami, large dogs, clockwork spiders, an animated settee, what-have-you; the stranger the better, hence the name of the race.  Many of the jockeys are wizards, or sponsored by wizards.  So, too, the prize money and the unusual enchanted items handed out to those jockeys or owners who win, place, or show.

This year's third-place winner, Handsome Dan "The Warlock Man" astride his war-ostrich, Penelope.


Below are this year's prizes, each a magic item of interest and particular use.

The Exaggerator.  This belt is made of braided storm giant beard-hair, bound in copper wire; when worn it has the continuous effect of making the wearer the most electrifying person in the room.  The Exaggerator accomplishes this by casting subtle illusions that make the wearer's appearance and actions seem more impressive or larger than they otherwise would.  While wearing the Exaggerator, your hair is shinier, your skin clearer; your pectorals and groin, slightly more bulging.  Further, the wearer seems a few inches taller, and their clothing more fashionable, tasteful, and expensive, even if only slightly.  These illusions may be temporarily dispelled by dispel magic and similar effects.
Effect: wearer has Advantage on all Charisma checks.

Cherry Wine.  This potent potable is more a potion than a beverage, although it began life as a very fine wine made from sour cherries.  Enchanced by a series of physics-altering spells, the cherry wine has one important effect, to wit: the drinker need not remove their armor in order to engage in fun physical activities such as swimming, climbing, jumping, and the like.  The spells in the wine somehow shunt some of the encumbrance of the armor into some other part of the world (possibly generating 'heavy' or reverse-gravity spots on other continents, which is pretty irresponsible wizardry).  The cherry wine intoxicates as normal when imbibed.
Effect: The drinker ignores any penalty to physical activity (marching, swimming, climbing, jumping, square-dancing, whatever) caused by encumbering armor for one hour.

Earring of Nyquist.  Forged in the Sulfurian undermountains by the eponymous sorceror-priest, the Earring of Nyquist has a protective function.  When worn, the earring has the ability to internalize 'samples' of any sonic attack to which its wearer is subject, which has two effects.  First, the earring attempts to produce counterharmonies immediately (although this is often too late).  Secondly, the samples of the sonic attack are then fed into the wearer's next sonic attack of their own (hence this item is really most useful to a bard or audiomancer).  The earring allows the cunning bard to learn from his misfortunes at the hands of those harpies, and channel a piece of that song into his next thunderous assault.
Effect: The wearer has advantage on saving throws against sonic attacks.  After surviving a sonic attack of any time, the wearer has advantage on their next sonic attack (if their attack does not require a roll, perhaps the target has disadvantage on their save).


Yes, the stats are 5e-ish, as I've been running 5e lately.

27 comments:

  1. I never in a million years thought I'd see a magic item based on "We Don't Have To Take Our Clothes Off." Bravo, sir.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you desperately need an honest and real death spell caster who can help you cast a perfect death spell on anyone then contact this great death spell caster called Dr Ogbifun He saved my marriage when he helped me cast a death spell on the lady that almost took my husband completely away from me and the kids. just within 24hours after the casting the bitch died in her sleeping bed. You too can try this man also,
      Call/WhatsApp: +2348102574680
      Email: ogbefunhearlingtemple@gmail.com DOCTOR OGBEIFUN CAN AS WELL HELP THE FOLLOWING PROBLEMS
      1. HIV/AIDS CURE
      2. HERPES CURE
      3. PENIS ENLARGEMENT
      4. PREGNANCY SPELL
      5. SPELL TO PREVENT CORONA VIRUS
      get all your problem solve..No problem is too big for
      him to solve..Contact him now









































































































































































      Delete
  2. QUANTUM BINARY SIGNALS

    Get professional trading signals sent to your cell phone daily.

    Follow our trades NOW & gain up to 270% per day.

    ReplyDelete
  3. If you want your ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend to come crawling back to you on their knees (even if they're dating somebody else now) you got to watch this video
    right away...

    (VIDEO) Get your ex CRAWLING back to you...?

    ReplyDelete
  4. DevDigs is an outclass SEO Company in Pakistan which focuses on the delivery of supreme-quality and first-class All Best SEO Packages Pakistan. SEO Agency Pakistan is a talented group of SEO experts that are capable to collaborate with both small-scale as well as large scale industries. The well-trained and up to date SEO experts at DevDigs deliver All SEO Services Pakistan beyond expectations so as to promote healthy relationships with numerous types of businesses.
    DevDigs is a leading Digital Marketing Agency Pakistan which aims to deliver top-quality SEO Pakistan. Their SEO procedure takes in keyword research. In order to perform a further relevant investigation, DevDigs implements a number of different effective and useful tools. SEO Agency Pakistan makes the selection of keywords by keeping in view numerous considerable aspects e.g., target audience, type of their business, geographic location etc.

    ReplyDelete

  5. You can check content from your own web site to create positive no one else has been rending you off!

    Plagiarism checker free

    Plagiarism checker online

    Plagiarism detector free

    ReplyDelete
  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Are you tired of being human, having talented brain turning to a vampire in a good posture in ten minutes, Do you want to have power and influence over others, To be charming and desirable, To have wealth, health, without delaying in a good human posture and becoming an immortal? If yes, these your chance. It's a world of vampire where life get easier,We have made so many persons vampires and have turned them rich, You will assured long life and prosperity, You shall be made to be very sensitive to mental alertness, Stronger and also very fast, You will not be restricted to walking at night only even at the very middle of broad day light you will be made to walk, This is an opportunity to have the human vampire virus to perform in a good posture. If you are interested contact us on Vampirelord7878@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  8. AWESOME !
    THATS GOOD TOPIC EVER !
    BOLAPELANGI - BANDAR MIX PARLAY TERBESAR DI INDONESIA HANYA DENGAN 1 USER ID SUDAH BISA BERMAIN SEMUA GAME.
    Prediksi Bola dan Togel.
    Mix Parlay
    Bola Jalan
    Bandar Bola

    ReplyDelete
  9. "Come to my website to view the contents of my website
    BOLA PELANGI - BANDAR MIX PARLAY TERBESAR DI INDONESIA HANYA DENGAN 1 USER ID SUDAH BISA BERMAIN SEMUA GAME. Join US ! klik link di bawah ini ☟
    Prediksi Parlay Jitu
    Mix Parlay
    Bola Jalan
    Bola Online
    Berita Bola


    Untuk Info Dan Bonus Menariknya Bisa Hubungi Kami Di Bawah Ini :
    WHATSAPP 1 : +6282143134681
    WHATSAPP 2 : +6281333472723
    Ayo buruann , mana tau kamu menjadi jutawan setelah bergabung dengan kami ..
    ♛ Group FB Prediksi Parlay = https://www.facebook.com/groups/346501502486292/
    ♛ Instagram = https://www.instagram.com/bolapelangi_01
    ♛ Pinterest = https://id.pinterest.com/bolapelangilounge/
    kami ..
    ♛ Group FB Prediksi Parlay = https://www.facebook.com/groups/346501502486292/
    ♛ Instagram = https://www.instagram.com/bolapelangi_01
    ♛ Pinterest = https://id.pinterest.com/bolapelangilounge/
    "

    ReplyDelete
  10. You should see how my partner Wesley Virgin's adventure begins in this SHOCKING AND CONTROVERSIAL video.

    As a matter of fact, Wesley was in the army-and shortly after leaving-he revealed hidden, "self mind control" secrets that the CIA and others used to get whatever they want.

    As it turns out, these are the exact same secrets lots of famous people (notably those who "come out of nowhere") and elite business people used to become wealthy and famous.

    You probably know that you use less than 10% of your brain.

    Really, that's because most of your BRAINPOWER is UNCONSCIOUS.

    Maybe this conversation has even occurred INSIDE OF YOUR very own head... as it did in my good friend Wesley Virgin's head around 7 years ago, while riding a non-registered, beat-up trash bucket of a car without a license and with $3 on his banking card.

    "I'm absolutely frustrated with living check to check! When will I become successful?"

    You took part in those types of thoughts, am I right?

    Your very own success story is waiting to happen. Go and take a leap of faith in YOURSELF.

    UNLOCK YOUR SECRET BRAINPOWER

    ReplyDelete
  11. Being a vampire is not what it seems like. It’s a life full of good, and amazing things. We are as human as you are.. It’s not what you are that counts, but how you choose to be. Do you want a life full of interesting things? Do you want to have power and influence over others? To be charming and desirable? To have wealth, health, and longevity? contact the vampires creed today via email: Richvampirekindom@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  12. Informative ideas. Keep it up!

    Vertri Limo provides one of the best Limo Service DC, Limousine Service in the Washington DC,

    Are You Looking forLimousine Service near me:

    . Cheap Limo Service
    . Prom Limo Service
    . Car Service Washington DC.

    Airport Transportation all over the Washington DC:
    Dulles Airport Transportation is the best Airport Limo Service of Vertri Limo.

    Airport Transfers service across all over the Washington DC.

    Car Service to DC
    DCA Car Service
    Limo Service DC
    Airport Transfers

    Reserve Airport Car Hire.
    Airport Shuttle Service
    Limo Airport Transfer
    limousine to airport service from Dulles, Baltimore Airport.

    Hire our Chauffeur Service
    for your luxury travel with professional Chauffeur.
    Chauffeur Car Service
    Chauffeur Service near me!



    Get Free Quote
    Reserve Limo Online for Luxury Tour!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Excellent piece of work. Superb effort!

    Airport Car Limo is serving Airport Limo Service and Airport Car Service in Washington DC.


    Airport Transportation Service provides you Airport Pickup Service to and from Reagan National Airport ,Baltimore & Dulles Airport.

    Our Airport Limousine Service are:

    Prom Limo Service
    BWI Car Service
    IAD Car Service.

    Wedding limousine Service!
    Make your Day Special with Wedding Limo, Wedding Limo Service & Wedding Limo Hire for prom nights.


    Book an Online trip to the Washington DC Airport!

    Airport Transportation Dulles
    Shuttle Service or Dulles Airport Transportation.

    Door-to-Door Airport Transportation to and from Washington DC airports including DCA, Dulles and BWI.

    DCA Airport Limo Car
    REAGAN NATIONAL AIRPORT

    Dulles Airport Transportation
    Car Service to Dulles
    IAD Airport Limo Car

    BALTIMORE AIRPORT LIMO
    Dulles Airport Taxi

    ReplyDelete
  14. Good work.I really appreciate it.

    Infinity Limo Car is providing Limo Service DC , Dulles Limo Service.

    Book Car Service Washington DC & Car Service DC at affordable prices in Washington DC, Virginia and Maryland.

    Make your day special and avail Luxury Car Service:

    Wedding Limo Hire
    Wedding Limo Service for everyone through Washington DC, Virginia or Maryland.

    Airport Services:
    Airport Transportation near me
    Car Service DC
    Car Service Washington DC

    Services Demanded by celebrities & famous personalities:
    Hummer limo
    Hummer Limo Rental .
    Limo Rental Prices.

    Shuttle & Bus Services:
    Suburban SUV Rental
    Shuttle Service
    Limo Bus Rental

    Get Free Quote
    Reserve Limo Online Now for Luxury Tour!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Well Done! Highly recommended.

    WashingtonDC Limo Car is facilitaing with Luxury Car Service, Limo Service DC in Maryland, Virginia & Washington DC at cheap Limo Rental Prices.

    Prom Nights Service:

    Prom Limo Service ensures best Prom Limo Hire servive.
    Enjoy Cheap Limo Service.

    We are providing Airport Transfers to Washington DC, Maryland & Virginia.

    .BWI Airport Limousine And Car Service
    .BWI Car Service .BWI Limo Service.
    . Car Service to Dulles
    . IAD Car Service . Dulles Airport Limousine Service.
    . Dulles Airport Transportation
    . Car Service to Dulles.

    Book the luxury airport shuttle near you.

    Car Service Washington DC
    Airport Car Rental
    Airport Chauffeur Service to meet the demands of people traveling to and from Washington DC.

    Get Free Quote
    Reserve Limo Online Now for Luxury Tour!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Dear Admin, you have shared very informative information with us through your article. this information is very useful for me and you are doing amazing work keep it up. I want also to share something with you. Thank you so much for sharing this and I wish you all the best for the upcoming article. norton.com/setup
    www.norton.com/setup, Norton product key

    ReplyDelete
  17. This is very informative post, good work, i like this content and wish to read more from you. thanks for such a informative post. i also like to share some useful links.
    McAfee.com/activate,
    www.mcafee.com/activate,
    www.mcafee.com/activate total protection,
    www.mcafee.com/activate product key

    ReplyDelete