The other day Christopher (of Carapace King) said of playing in Wampus Country:
"My dude will almost certainly be eaten by an animate dutch oven or something and I need to know what kind of dog-faced washerwoman I'll be taking to glory in his place."
Naturally this triggered some calls for a Wampus-specific henchman table of some sort. And, on top of that, I still owed William (of A Wizard's Kiss) some sort of table with NPC quirks. Hopefully this table covers both of those things...
d100 Henchpersons & Hangers-On (also to be known as the "Dog-Faced Washerwoman" Table)
It's a g-doc, as usual, which you can save off and customize, or download in pdf format.
The first column has a personality trait or notable physical trait.
The second column has a profession or personality trait.
The third column is an object.
To roll up a henchman (or townsfolk-type NPC), roll on columns A and B to get results like "hot-tempered yodeller" and "fashion-conscious tobacconist". A roll on column C may give you an object that the hench carries around, or perhaps seeks. So that's the dog-faced washerwoman sorted.
Now for the animate dutch oven... Wampus Country does indeed seem to have its share of animated objects and things wandering about, doesn't it - notably good ol' Wiggybench, animated park-bench companion to Lord Vallasen of Frogport.
You too can have (or be) an animated hench-object! Ground rules:
1) Approximately one in thirty henchables will be animated objects. When recruiting, roll a d30, and on a 30, there you go.
2) Roll on the table below for a convenient HENCH-OBJECT ORIGIN and it will direct you to roll on certain columns in the Dog-Faced Washerwoman table.
1,2, 3 - Tragically Cursed! Used to be a B, but is now sadly an A C.
4 - Cursed And Loving It! Was once an A B, but is now an A C, and is enjoying its new form immensely.
5, 6 - Magical Creation (Design). Brought to life intentionally by a wizard-type; is an A C.
7, 8 - Magical Creation (Spontaneous). Was always a C, but was bathed in magical energy in some fashion, and awakened to sapience and its A personality.
9 - Avatar. Was once an angel, fairy, or otherdimensional gewgaw, now placed into the form of an A C with an important epic mission - or so it believes.
10 - Marvelous Two-In-One. Reroll origin, but roll on C twice, combining the two. Stitched, lashed together, glued, something. (Optional: pick an animal-generating table from somewhere and mix that in if you like - a housecat with a beer-stein for a head sounds pretty cool to me)
Some curse effects may turn a PC into an animated (non-hench) object as well, but that will require winging it a bit. All animated objects are subject to various weaknesses and craziness based on their form.
Animated hench-objects are ambulatory if they have legs (like a table or wood-stove), or are essentially a pile of something. Otherwise, they'll have to be carried. Objects with four or more legs may carry passengers/riders if of the appropriate size and weight.
Most (75%) animated hench-objects have the power of speech, with a little mouth appearing somewhere. All animated hench-objects are assumed to have the same senses as a normal human, along with similar vulnerabilities, even if they don't technically have eyes.
Spellcasters transformed into a hench-object may still cast spells so long as they have the power of speech. However, this can be a real pain - just ask the wizard Sebacious Bumkindle, who was transformed into an animated bedpan, and must now be pointed at his enemies by his mentally-challenged gibbon porter, Mister Joops.
|"Clumsy, pea-brained oaf seeks gainful employment, preferably involving firearms."|